“People who have been having sex for decades get into this thinking where they know everything there is to know about sex,” says McDevitt. The reality? “False.”
Our bodies and desires change over time, so it can be useful to check in with your partner to recalibrate your sex life. Britton recommends an exercise she calls “skin time” to get re-acquainted with each other: Lie naked, side by side, without cell phones or other distractions and without the promise of sex. “We’re looking for erotic attunement here,” says Britton.
Take time to re-learn what turns your partner on. If she was too tame for bondage back when you got married, it’s possible she’s eager to try it now. Exploring both old and new fantasies can revive the passions you had at the beginning of your relationship.
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