In the same vein, arousal comes from the unexpected. Our brains are hard-wired to seek novel experiences, and we secrete dopamine in response to things that are new and exciting.
“When there’s novelty, we get a great sense of sexual satisfaction, and it’s almost like we’re feeling all of those same hormones that were there in the first stages of romance,” says Bryce Britton, Ph.D., a Los Angeles-based sexologist.
Start small by sending her flowers for no reason, or greet her when she comes home from work by wearing a trench coat—and nothing on underneath. Then spice things up by searching around your house for new spots to have sex, like on top of your laundry machine or the kitchen island. (Just make sure the kids aren’t home, and your silverware is stashed away.)
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